If I Were a Boy

I heard a song last night I thought would be interesting to examine for this class. It's actually a bit confusing to me. It definitely sends mixed messages about gender in my opinion. The song is called "If I Were a Boy" by Beyonce Knowles. In the past, she's been known for singing empowering songs such as "Survivor" (when she was in the band Destiny's Child) and "Irreplaceable." I can see why some people would argue that this new song is also empowering, but I don't think it is. Here are the lyrics:

If I were a boy
Even just for a day
I’d roll out of bed in the morning
And throw on what I wanted and go
Drink beer with the guys
And chase after girls
I’d kick it with who I wanted
And I’d never get confronted for it
Because they’d stick up for me

Chorus: If I were a boy
I think I could understand
How it feels to love a girl
I swear I’d be a better man
I’d listen to her
Cause I know how it hurts
When you lose the one you wanted
Cause he’s taken you for granted
And everything you had got destroyed

If I were a boy
I would turn off my phone
Tell everyone it's broken
So they think
that I was sleeping alone
I’d put myself first
And make the rules as I go
Cause I know that she’d be faithful
Waiting for me to come home

Chorus

It’s a little too late for you to come back
Say it's just a mistake
Think I forgive you like that
If you thought I would wait for you
You thought wrong


But you're just a boy
You don’t understand
How it feels to love a girl
Someday you’ll wish you were a better man
You don’t listen to her
You don’t care how it hurts
Until you lose the one you wanted
Cause you've taken her for granted
And everything you had got destroyed
But you're just a boy…

I think there are a lot of problematic things with this song. Just like so many other things, it falls into the trap of gender stereotypes. Not all men are the way she describes them. Not only that, women cheat too, not just men.

I think the chorus is where she is trying, in a weird way, to be empowering. I think she's trying to teach men to be better and to appreciate the women in their life more. But the rest of the song appears to be a mixed message to women to act like men in order to teach their partner to appreciate them more.

The video was also problematic to me. Until the end of the video, it's showing her as this strong woman acting like a man. Therefore, her partner makes her breakfast and she doesn't thank him. She goes off to work being a cop. She teaches her partner at work how to shoot better. None of these images seem wrong to me, but she is using them to show this world where women act like men. Therefore, traditional women can't be cops or have their husbands make breakfast for them or for that matter, be a better shot than a man.

Gender roles in marriage

Along with having a section on feminism in this class, I have been taking a Gender Studies class this semester, so I've put a lot of thought into gender roles. The more I think about it, I really do believe that gender is a cultural thing. People "act" their gender. I do it all the time in public. I act like a girl. If you don't act your gender, you're seen differently right? One of the things I'm usually not open about is my marriage. I don't lie to anyone, I just usually don't let other people, especially our families, see how our marriage really works. In a lot of ways, my marriage isn't traditional. My husband didn't work the first year of our marriage. He went to school full-time, and did most of the housework. Right now, we both work and go to school. Usually, we split housework pretty evenly when we're both working. I'm in my first trimester of pregnancy, however, which leaves me tired and sick a lot, so he's picked up the slack. It's been interesting, though, because we are currently staying with my mother-in-law. In a way, it makes me feel like I need to be doing it, or she'll think I'm failing Adam as a wife. I don't believe that myself, I'm just afraid that my "raised in the 1950s" mother-in-law will. I don't really see the point of doing the traditional gender division of jobs. I'll take the trash out sometimes, I'll even mow the lawn sometimes. I think whoever has the time should do it. When we have our baby next year, I don't plan on either one of us making enough to live on one income, but I do plan on one of us only working part-time. If I happen to make more than my husband, he can be the one that only works part-time. I have no qualms about him taking care of the baby or the house. I can see a lot of ways that he will be a better parent than me.

After all that seriousness, I do have something funny to say about gender roles: I always joke and tell Adam that he's the girl in our relationship because I always am ready before him and end up waiting for him. :)

Female Chauvinist Pigs

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c

Ariel Levy

Colbert at Christmas
Colbert Christmas DVD

Green Screen
Bill O'Reilly Interview

After listening to our discussion in class about this book, I have a lot to say. I think the question that had the most deviations in answers was "What are women getting out of this?" Some of the people in our class tended to disagree with Levy and contend that raunch culture truly is an empowering thing for women. I'm with Levy. I don't think it is. And I think that is the basis of way this third wave of feminism seems so weak compared to the other two. The other two waves of feminism had goals about getting equality for all women. This new raunch culture seems to be about getting empowerment for yourself. According to Levy, many women are doing this by acting like men. Well, that might make her more powerful or equal to men, but it is not a step forward for all women everywhere.

In fact, that reminds me of something Gloria Steinem said during the campaign this fall. She wrote an Op-Ed piece for the LA Times about Sarah Palin. What she said about McCain's pick of Palin also, in my mind, fits in perfectly with the idea of raunch culture as a whole. She said "Feminism has never been about getting a job for one woman. It's about making life more fair for women everywhere." I have actually thought about this idea on and off for quite some time. Back when I took English 3703, I read Gertrude Stein's The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas. I got the same feeling from her. She acted like a man, and was generally treated equally, but I wouldn't consider her a feminist. Just like I wouldn't consider Sarah Palin a feminist, or most of the women Levy uses as examples in her book for that matter. Even if this raunch culture continues, which I'm sure it will, it will not lead to the true empowerment of women. If you think otherwise, take a second look at Levy's chapter Pigs in Training. I highlighted so many quotes that just made me feel terrible. Here are some of them:

"I asked Talia if most girls expected any kind of reciprocal sexual gratification for their services. "I don't think most girls are expecting to have orgasms in high school," she concluded, "but most guys are. Oh, definitely.""

"Sex was something you did to fit in more than something you did for pleasure."

"About a quarter of girls between ages fifteen and nineteen describe their first time as "voluntary but unwanted."

"The only message that seems to be successfully transmitted to girls about sex and sexiness is that it is something they need to embody to be cool."

"Whether or not they had had sex, the girls had remarkably difficult times experiencing or expressing sexual desires."

I agree with Levy that a more comprehensive sex-ed program would begin to help. Like she said, we shouldn't just tech kids not to have sex. We should teach them why they should, because basically all teens will eventually have sex. Girls are growing up thinking that sexuality is about being seen as sexy, which is not true.

Just a quick P.S. if anyone watched the clip. I loved it! Colbert coming out in high heels was hilarious, but I loved Levy's statement about how messed up the idea of women imitating the "fake lust" of porn stars and strippers is, rather than finding women who truly enjoy their sexuality on their own terms.

Knocked Up

I was flipping through my cable channels the other day and saw that Knocked Up was on. I saw the movie when it first came out, but decided to watch it again, both for this class and because I'm now pregnant myself. After it came out, I remember hearing some controversy about how the female lead of the movie, Katherine Heigl, claimed afterwards that she didn't love the movie because she thought it was sexist. After watching it, I did some sleuthing on the internet to find out the details of what was really said.

Katherine Heigl gave an interview to Vanity Fair afterwards, in which she said that Knocked Up is "a little sexist" and "it paints the women as shrews, as humorless and uptight, and it paints the men as lovable, goofy, fun-loving guys." The director of the film, Judd Apatow, felt the need to respond, and he made fun of the use of the word "shrew," asking if we were in the 1600s again. The website Buzzsugar did a poll asking people if they thought the movie was sexist. A good majority of the people thought it was sexist, but that it wasn't really a big deal. I tend to agree. Although it did spark some controversy, and other news outlets online wrote more about it, I don't think we need to necessarily take things so seriously.

This is why- even though the movie is sexist towards women, I think it can be argued that the movie is also sexist toward men. Just look at the preview up above. The female lead, Alison, is a strong career-minded woman who has just achieved an amazing promotion. The male lead, Ben, is basically a loser. He claims to be an illegal immigrant, he lives off money he received from a work injury, and seems to have no motivation in life other than to get high with his friends. One of the main points of the movie is that having a baby makes him grow up and finally become an adult, whereas Alison is to that point already.

There are parts that are sexist, though, and these are the ones I think are the worst. Two of the three actually involve the sister of the lead character, which is interesting because the actress who played her is married to the director of the film. One part is actually in the preview. Alison's sister and brother-in-law are getting ready for bed and the husband, Pete, tries to initiate sex. Debbie, the wife, replies by saying something like "Well, I'm constipated, but if you really want to.." The second part is when Debbie irrationally thinks Pete is cheating on her. When she finds out he is actually just doing a fantasy baseball draft, she stays mad, even claiming it's worse than cheating because he just doesn't want to spend time with her. The third thing is that near the end of the pregnancy, especially while she is in labor, Alison is portrayed to be a bit shrewish, like the actress said. Yes, all of these parts are funny, but they also just portray typical stereotypes of women. Women make excuses to get out of sex. Women always think mean are cheaters and don't have any trust. Women always scream and yell at their partners, especially during labor. These stereotypes are funny, but not always true.

Feminism 101

Based on that quiz, one would think that feminism is simply believing that women deserve equal rights. It's more than just about belief though. At its heart, though, feminism is the movement to secure equal rights for women. There have been strong women since the beginning of time who have argued for women's rights. Mary Wollstonecraft wrote a treatise entitled A Vindication of the Rights of Woman, in which she argues that although women appear inferior to men, it is only because they lack the education that men receive. In the late 14th and 15th century, a woman named Christine de Pizan wrote many thing, among which there was a collection of stories of women's contributions to society (albeit some are not technically true) entitled The Book of the City of Ladies.

However, feminism as a clear movement did not come about until the 19th century. The first wave of feminism is seen to officially have begun in 1848 at the Seneca Falls Convention. At this convention, a document was drafted entitled Declaration of Sentiments and Resolutions. It is modeled after the Declaration of Independence, and therefore argues for gender equality. The main goal of the first wave of feminism was suffrage, which was gained in 1920 with the passage of the 19th Amendment.

The second wave of feminism began in the 1960s alongside the civil rights movement. Women such as Gloria Steinem and Betty Friedan lead this wave of the movement, which fought for things that passed (Roe v. Wade), and things that did not pass (Equal Rights Amendment). I learned from Female Chauvinist Pigs that this wave seemed to fall apart when it broke apart over pornography. Some feminist were sex-positive and thought that pornography was empowering, and some bonded with the right-wing movement trying to limit the advancement of pornography.

The third wave of feminism began in the 1980s or 90s. Ariel Levy focuses on this wave, and calls it the "raunch girl" movement. One thing that is different about this wave is that it doesn't seem to be as unified as the other two, and it doesn't seem to have a clear goal in mind other than sexual empowerment. I'll post my thoughts on this movement, and on Levy's book, in another post.

Introduction

This blog is my final project for English 5960: Theories of Popular Culture. In it, I will discuss popular culture through the lens of feminism. I decided to do this because I do consider myself to be a feminist. In fact (sarcastic tone in place), I found a quiz online to prove it!

You Are 98% Feminist

You are a total feminist. This doesn't mean you're a man hater (in fact, you may be a man). You just think that men and women should be treated equally. It's a simple idea but somehow complicated for the world to put into action.

Are You a Feminist?

So what is feminism? Well, I'll get into that in my next post, but it is interesting to look at what the quiz asks to determine the level of feminist belief a person has. The quiz consists of statements that you must rate your level of agreement with in a range from strongly agree to strongly disagree.

1- Women should be economically and socially independent. They shouldn't rely on men to take care of them.
2- There is no such thing as a "man's job." It is wrong for men to be given preference for any job position, even if women traditionally aren't in that field.
3- Men and women should be held to the same sexual standards. If men can sleep around without judgment, women should be able to as well.
4- Women should take an equal role in dating. Women should ask out people they are interested in and take their turn in paying.
5- Women should accept their bodies as they are. Women should not have to conform to wacky beauty ideals.
6- A woman should be able to marry and have kids with anyone she wants- including another woman.
7- Women should have the right to choose any path in life- from being a stay at home mom to a Fortune 500 CEO.
8- Women should be encouraged to pursue education as much as men are.
9- Women should have legal, easy access to all types of birth control- including the morning after pill.
10- You would support a woman for president (if you agreed with her politics).